By Whitney Derman

Financial abuse is not talked about nearly enough. It is both terrible on its own and serves to make any other form of abuse worse. This is because it’s a common way for abusers to trap their victims. For example, let’s say someone is being sexually abused by their spouse; getting out of a relationship like that can be scary. But when financial abuse is at play as well, the victim may have no means of getting out of the situation on their own. (Kippert, 2021)

Financial abuse, in simple terms, is the act of stealing or withholding money from another person.  It is usually experienced between people who are romantically involved. (Women’s Law, 2021) Financial abuse can start off as seemingly sweet; maybe your partner says they don’t want you to work so you can spend more time together, you don’t have to stress out over finances, or so they can take care of you. (Kippert, 2021)

Traditional marriages relied on men as breadwinners, so having a man who wants to take on a traditional role may seem sweet and endearing at first. However, if a man is insistent on having you not work and is not simply helping you out in rough times, this is a huge red flag.

There are two primary reasons for financial abuse—control and entrapment. By not allowing their partner to handle, see, or make their own finances, an abuser takes control of their partner’s life. The abused person has to ask their partner for money if they want to do anything. This can apply to things like shopping; but it can also be a way for abusers to prevent their partners from seeing friends and family, going to work, attending classes, etc. Cutting off someone’s freedom to spend can sever their other connections and force them to lose opportunities for personal and financial growth. (Kippert, 2021) When done to this extent, it is a way for the abuser to trap their partner because they no longer have the money or resources to leave. They become completely dependent on their partner.

Although the term was never mentioned by name in the movie, Back to the Future Part II is a good example of a financially abusive relationship. In the film, the protagonist, Marty McFly, accidentally travels to an alternate 1985 where his father is dead and his mother is married to the franchise’s main antagonist, Biff Tannen. In one scene, Marty’s mother threatens to leave Biff, but he responds by threatening to cut off her and her entire family. (Zemeckis & Spielberg, 1989) When this threat is made, his mom completely drops the fight and accepts the reality of the situation. Based on this interaction, it is apparent that she has no access to any money and relies solely on Biff for both her and her children to stay on their feet, forcing her to stay in a physically and sexually abusive marriage with no plausible way out.

In relationships, make sure you have access to money and can spend it without permission. You should also know where your joint finances are going, and not need to rely solely on your partner for cash. (Women’s Law, 2021) If any of these needs are not met, it can be a sign you’re in a financially abusive relationship.

To learn more about Financial Abuse, visit GoARO.org and the sources below. Please consider donating to support ARO. 
 
Sources
“Financial abuse.” WomensLaw.org. (February 24, 2021). https://www.womenslaw.org/about-abuse/forms-abuse/financial-abuse/all#node-27115.
Kippert, A. “What is financial abuse?” DomesticShelters.org. (May 19, 2021). https://www.domesticshelters.org/articles/identifying-abuse/what-is-financial-abuse.
Spielberg, S. Back to the Future Part II. (1989). United States; Universal. https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0096874/.